pure, 100% smutty stuff. tell me which chara you want, refer to the wishlist if you have any questions about what kind of starter you wanna write/pictures you post/ships you wanna do.
[ daichi really has no idea how the hell this happened.
he's a good person, really, he does all his school work on time, he helps his parents when they need it, calls his grandparents at regular intervals, and he captained a powerful volleyball team.
of course it's that last part that turned into his poor downfall, when they agreed to go to tokyo for training camp. none of them had any idea what it meant to deal with something so big, but that it would be good for them, their team, to make them stronger so they could finally make it to nationals. they'd have a few long weekends and then one full summer week to do nothing but train, to learn and improve.
too bad it wasn't nearly that simple, not with one kuroo tetsurou in the picture.
daichi was drawn to nekoma's captain immediately when they first met for the practice match. all cutting angles and the strong stride with equally set shoulders, ready for anything the world throws at him. it's only worse when daichi has to see him every single day, ends up talking shop with him, the teasing and bickering between them increasing every second. it turns out it doesn't end with the training camp either - it bleeds into texting, to snapchat, to random phone calls when kuroo is feeling particularly cheeky. daichi finds himself going from begrudgingly answering to looking forward to each moment.
apparently, kuroo isn't on another boat about the matter, because kuroo is inviting daichi down to tokyo to visit right after they both graduate, for some actual sight seeing this time, that daichi can stay over kuroo's house for the weekend. maybe he shouldn't have agreed, or asked if suga could come with him, but nope, daichi let himself get ahead of himself.
but nope, here they are, daichi curled up next to kuroo on the couch after a long day of walking tokyo, watching some late night movie on tv, drinking vending machine beer. kuroo's parents out somewhere (of course, of course they are, that's why it had to be this weekend) leaving them all alone. it makes it that much harder for daichi to not stare at kuroo's cheeks, which are starting to turn red after his third beer. they're just friends, daichi tells himself for the fiftieth time today.
he really did see this coming, he swears, and yet daichi still let it all happen.
(and here he thought cats were supposed to be the curious ones, not crows). ]
( in Kuroo's defense, this is entirely Sawamura's fault. by now, Kenma's so used to his bullshit that when Kuroo starts getting too boisterous, he gets ignored. Bokuto is fun, but he gets all wound up and overexcited. but Sawamura...Sawamura gives as good as he gets, boxes down Kuroo's antics neatly, and stays on the same level. he's delightfully cunning under his good-captain surface, witty and sardonic and genuine in good balance. in short: Kuroo doesn't have to worry too much about scoping his behaviour around him. he's confident that Sawamura will drag him back if he steps out of line somehow. and it's really, really comfortable.
plus he's as bad at this borderline-flirting as Kuroo himself is, which makes him feel slightly less like a complete goober every time he gets a text back and finds Kenma rolling his eyes at his goofy grin.
Kuroo honestly hadn't thought Sawamura would actually take him up on his offer. at the very least he'd expected some caveat, maybe even some terms of engagement, but instead here they are, just the two of them, hanging out all day like ol' pals. here they are, curled up side by side on his couch, drinking terrible beer and watching terrible tv, because that's what friends do, right, they hang out. yeah. man, it's hot in here...
he sets his empty can down carelessly and reaches for another. he's drinking too much and too fast - Kuroo knows it - but it's the best way he's got of distracting himself from the insistent skipping of his heartbeat. the alcohol makes him stupid. he can't organise his thoughts properly; when he gets a sentence together his tongue trips all over it, and he ends up saying far more than he means to. it's distressing, really it is, but his options are truly limited.
the first swig from the new can is horrifically bitter. Kuroo pulls a face and sighs heavily. this...this is bad.
he turns mournful eyes to Sawamura: ) Fuck man, I'm too drunk to drunk more. Drink. Isn't that sad?!
[ excuse you kuroo, it wasn't daichi's idea to spend a weekend together, it wasn't him who choose the noodle joint for dinner that had them bumping shoulders (one he has to admit was amazing, damn kuroo for having such good taste), and it definitely wasn't his idea to buy beers to take home. he's just the poor accomplice who helped buy them and bring them back.
unfortunately, the light buzz of a couple beers make this curling up easier, makes everything feel warmer, although still, daichi is pretty sure it's a mistake. probably. maybe.
he raises an eyebrow watching kuroo throw back beers, especially when he winces around the first sip from a newly cracked can. ]
Then maybe you shouldn't've guzzled 'em. [ daichi plucks the can out of kuroo's hand, stealing it away and taking a drink without thinking of any of the implications. definitely a mistake. ]
And shit, why did you have to get such crap beer?
it was either that or bill & ted's homosexual adventure tbh
I didn't ask for a lecture, Mom,( Kuroo grouses. Sawamura's such an old man sometimes, it's unbelievable. ) I was asking for commiseration here. Aren't we comrades?!
( half-heartedly he reaches to reclaim his property, but-- oh. well, he and the guys share drink bottles all the time, right? even if it's mostly accidental because they all look the damn same. something like this doesn't count...as..well.
shit, man; Kuroo wishes he wasn't so tipsy. his head is getting really stupid.
he thumps Sawamura lightly in the arm. )
What am I, made of money? Not a poor student?
( Kuroo shakes his head. this time he does nick the can back, bracing himself for another swig. it tastes better, somehow. must just be his imagination.
his tongue runs away by itself again, and has a smirk as its accomplice. ) Y'know, if you wanted to swap spit you coulda just asked.
[ kuroo's whining has become as commonplace and manageable as any whining or bickering from his own teammates. constant communication has left daichi familiar with the jokes kuroo tends to make or the way he curves around conversation to his favor. daichi rolls his eyes at easily recognizable bait, snorting behind the aluminum. ]
We could be comrades, if you spent an extra fifty yen a can so we could drink something vaguely less piss tasting.
[ bantering like this is too easy, too much fun, god, why didn't they hang out sooner again? or right, school and volleyball. the usual suspects.
he isn't surprised at kuroo stealing the can back, but his surprised when kuroo drinks right from the can after him. daichi's eyes go wide in realization that stealing his can and drinking from it was actually a way bigger mistake than anticipated.
no time for lingering over it, slowing down now is only going to make it worse. ]
You want better beer? You pay for it. My budget's very strict, I'll have you know. If you overspend my money you'll have to answer to my spreadsheets.
( just kidding - Kuroo's budgeting skills consist of looking at his wallet and trying not to cry. it's a talent and he's proud of it.
Sawamura's remarks cut him to the quick; he demonstrates this by gasping, hand over his heart. ) So cruel! Ah, but you didn't even notice until I said anything, which only proves that my spit is neutral at worst and delightful at best.
( discussing characteristics of spit is probably one of Kuroo's smoother moves, and that's just sad. )
Right, you have a strict spreadsheet managed budget, and I'm secretly the emperor.
[ daichi even makes a sweeping hand gesture to emphasize the point. seriously kuroo, even for being drunk that was still a pretty poor attempt. but then again, his own responses are getting slower, they really should stop drinking before this gets worse.
it doesn't help that after all those beers it's getting harder and harder to not openly laugh at kuroo and his shit. ]
What the hell are you talking about? That beer was way worse, doesn't that make your spit super nasty?
Your highness, I had no idea! ( Kuroo attempts a bow but gives up when he almost falls into Sawamura's lap. he starts to giggle, jamming his hand against his mouth to try and stem it. ) For such a regular guy you sure have some impressive secrets.
( he manages to stop laughing - barely, and lounges back at an angle that doesn't make his head spin quite so much. he should really have some water or something, he thinks, and takes another swig instead. close enough. )
What brings you from your lofty throne, ( a grandiose wave, ) to slum amongst us common folk? Did you feel the need for nasty beer and nastier body fluids?
What?? [ as much as he doesn't want to, daichi starts laughing in disbelief that kuroo is going along with such an idiotic claim. but then again, of course he is, that's just what kuroo does, that incredible six foot nerd.
daichi helps kuroo sit back up, shaking his head and giving the most overdramatic sigh he can muster. ]
Oh, it was always my dream to go to a normal high school with normal little country boys, raise a volleyball team from practically scratch, but I just loved it so much I had to keep going with it through university.
[ daichi doesn't keep a straight face through any of that, but kuroo is right there, warm and too funny, and so daichi just... goes with it. it's too easy, it always is, whenever kuroo is spurring him on. ]
Beer and body fluids are just, par for the course.
Little country boys, huh? That's disturbing, Sawamura. ( he shakes his head in clear disappointment. ) At least that means I'm safe from your dastardly clutches.
( not that he necessarily wants to be, but does he want to be involved with some hick-fetish pedo?? probably not. can't trust these Karasuno guys. )
Spare me your sick tales, please. I'm not into that kind of thing.
Oh my god, only you would think about that you perv. [ daichi smacks his shoulder, totally a thing friends do. just friends. friends who lean all over each other when they get drunk. yeah. ]
How do I know you're not the one lechering around?
If I was leching, you'd know. For example, my eyebrows would probably be waggling suggestively, ( like this, ) and I'd be doing a way better job of getting your pants off.
( possibly by spilling beer on them, like thi-- ok no, he's not that desperate. yet.
Kuroo lounges back with a shit-eating grin and nudges him with his knee. ) Any signals I'm missing?
[ despite his best effort to keep a straight face, his face falls into a disbelieving half smile, something that almost might be hopeful. he hadn't really thought about doing anything with kuroo-- no, that's not true, it's more like he cuts those fantasies off before they can get bad.
still though, this little rant begs a lot of questions, and daichi wants to ask them before they do anything that they are really, really going to regret come the morning. daichi doesn't leave until tomorrow night after all, and he'd rather not move that up. ]
Why don't you backtrack to the part where you admitted you invited me down here to get my pants off.
( Kuroo actually panics for second, replaying the last few minutes of conversation in his head. this is tricky, because he's well buzzed by now and that makes concentration very difficult, but he's still pretty sure that Sawamura is making shit up. )
I-- when did I say anything of the kind?! ( although, on the other hand-- ) Is that your wishful thinking speaking, Sawamura-kun?
( if so: fuckin' jackpot. Kenma wil never believe he pulled this off. )
[ if he were a kinder person, daichi would write off the momentary confusion and the hesitation all over kuroo's face as a side effect of all that beer. too bad daichi has no mercy at all, especially because of the beer. ]
I think you're the only one wishful thinking, otherwise you wouldn't've brought up getting into my pants at all, Kuroo-kun.
[ daichi easily matches kuroo's obnoxious fucking tone, dying to see how flustered kuroo can get. ]
(tch. he should've known Sawamura'd have a comeback at the ready.
Kuroo assumes his loftiest expression. )
It was an example of common lecherousnesses, Sawamura, an example. Or is showing a bit of ankle still considered flirting where you're from? ( his smirk widens, snide. ) If so, what should I make of you always turning up in shorts? What a harlot.
[ daichi holds the deadest stare, raising his eyebrow at kuroo. it's a pretty good try, but not ine daichi can't handle. ]
So do you, hell, you don't even wear kneepads. Bringing up all this lecher talk that makes you like... [ he airly waves a hand, trying to grasp the right word. ] the biggest harlot.
( kneepads? is this some kind of weird fetish, Sawamura-- because he can accommodate that.
he carefully catches Daichi's hand before it can smack him in the face, and that's gonna be his firm excuse about why he's holding it. )
Wow, so eloquent. You're almost as smart as me when you're drunk, huh? ( Kuroo snickers, and never mind that he's poking fun at himself here, too. ) Of course I'm a giant harlot. This is the big city; that's what it's for.
( what hand. just forget it exists, Sawamura, and we never have to admit this ever happened. it's a win-win!
Kuroo presses his free hand over his heart and attempts to reel. it's slightly offset by the fact that he does actually start to fall and has to use his grip on this mysterious hand to right himself. what a suave guy. )
I'm so hurt! If I knew you were going to be hell-bent on breaking my heart, I would never've invited you down, you know. ( the jackal grin returns. ) Ahh-- but you'll be living here soon enough, won't you? Best get used to it sooner than later, Sawamura. You're already halfway to trollop-dom.
At least give corruption a try before you run away from it. Where's the harm in that~?
( yeah this is totally a conversation about tertiary education and not about dudes holding hands on couches, drunk, and badly attempting to flirt. at all. )
( oh, Sawamura, you sweet summer child, Kuroo thinks. and then, because he's more than a little tipsy, he actually says it out loud. )
Oh, Sawamura, you sweet summer child, ( he uses Daichi's own hand to pretend to wipe away these fake tears, ) don't you know how the rest of the saying goes??
( --actually, how does it go?? ah, that's right. Kuroo leans in, grinning. there are crocodiles who would be jealous of this expression. )
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i bet u can't guess who this is at All | @corvidad
im homo???
that song im laughing so much
he's a good person, really, he does all his school work on time, he helps his parents when they need it, calls his grandparents at regular intervals, and he captained a powerful volleyball team.
of course it's that last part that turned into his poor downfall, when they agreed to go to tokyo for training camp. none of them had any idea what it meant to deal with something so big, but that it would be good for them, their team, to make them stronger so they could finally make it to nationals. they'd have a few long weekends and then one full summer week to do nothing but train, to learn and improve.
too bad it wasn't nearly that simple, not with one kuroo tetsurou in the picture.
daichi was drawn to nekoma's captain immediately when they first met for the practice match. all cutting angles and the strong stride with equally set shoulders, ready for anything the world throws at him. it's only worse when daichi has to see him every single day, ends up talking shop with him, the teasing and bickering between them increasing every second. it turns out it doesn't end with the training camp either - it bleeds into texting, to snapchat, to random phone calls when kuroo is feeling particularly cheeky. daichi finds himself going from begrudgingly answering to looking forward to each moment.
apparently, kuroo isn't on another boat about the matter, because kuroo is inviting daichi down to tokyo to visit right after they both graduate, for some actual sight seeing this time, that daichi can stay over kuroo's house for the weekend. maybe he shouldn't have agreed, or asked if suga could come with him, but nope, daichi let himself get ahead of himself.
but nope, here they are, daichi curled up next to kuroo on the couch after a long day of walking tokyo, watching some late night movie on tv, drinking vending machine beer. kuroo's parents out somewhere (of course, of course they are, that's why it had to be this weekend) leaving them all alone. it makes it that much harder for daichi to not stare at kuroo's cheeks, which are starting to turn red after his third beer. they're just friends, daichi tells himself for the fiftieth time today.
he really did see this coming, he swears, and yet daichi still let it all happen.
(and here he thought cats were supposed to be the curious ones, not crows). ]
pansy division are a gift unto this world
plus he's as bad at this borderline-flirting as Kuroo himself is, which makes him feel slightly less like a complete goober every time he gets a text back and finds Kenma rolling his eyes at his goofy grin.
Kuroo honestly hadn't thought Sawamura would actually take him up on his offer. at the very least he'd expected some caveat, maybe even some terms of engagement, but instead here they are, just the two of them, hanging out all day like ol' pals. here they are, curled up side by side on his couch, drinking terrible beer and watching terrible tv, because that's what friends do, right, they hang out. yeah. man, it's hot in here...
he sets his empty can down carelessly and reaches for another. he's drinking too much and too fast - Kuroo knows it - but it's the best way he's got of distracting himself from the insistent skipping of his heartbeat. the alcohol makes him stupid. he can't organise his thoughts properly; when he gets a sentence together his tongue trips all over it, and he ends up saying far more than he means to. it's distressing, really it is, but his options are truly limited.
the first swig from the new can is horrifically bitter. Kuroo pulls a face and sighs heavily. this...this is bad.
he turns mournful eyes to Sawamura: ) Fuck man, I'm too drunk to drunk more. Drink. Isn't that sad?!
truly a song for every gay occasion
unfortunately, the light buzz of a couple beers make this curling up easier, makes everything feel warmer, although still, daichi is pretty sure it's a mistake. probably. maybe.
he raises an eyebrow watching kuroo throw back beers, especially when he winces around the first sip from a newly cracked can. ]
Then maybe you shouldn't've guzzled 'em. [ daichi plucks the can out of kuroo's hand, stealing it away and taking a drink without thinking of any of the implications. definitely a mistake. ]
And shit, why did you have to get such crap beer?
it was either that or bill & ted's homosexual adventure tbh
( half-heartedly he reaches to reclaim his property, but-- oh. well, he and the guys share drink bottles all the time, right? even if it's mostly accidental because they all look the damn same. something like this doesn't count...as..well.
shit, man; Kuroo wishes he wasn't so tipsy. his head is getting really stupid.
he thumps Sawamura lightly in the arm. )
What am I, made of money? Not a poor student?
( Kuroo shakes his head. this time he does nick the can back, bracing himself for another swig. it tastes better, somehow. must just be his imagination.
his tongue runs away by itself again, and has a smirk as its accomplice. ) Y'know, if you wanted to swap spit you coulda just asked.
who says we still can't go there babe
We could be comrades, if you spent an extra fifty yen a can so we could drink something vaguely less piss tasting.
[ bantering like this is too easy, too much fun, god, why didn't they hang out sooner again? or right, school and volleyball. the usual suspects.
he isn't surprised at kuroo stealing the can back, but his surprised when kuroo drinks right from the can after him. daichi's eyes go wide in realization that stealing his can and drinking from it was actually a way bigger mistake than anticipated.
no time for lingering over it, slowing down now is only going to make it worse. ]
You spit in that?! No wonder it tastes so bad.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PEhMC8ID62A
( just kidding - Kuroo's budgeting skills consist of looking at his wallet and trying not to cry. it's a talent and he's proud of it.
Sawamura's remarks cut him to the quick; he demonstrates this by gasping, hand over his heart. ) So cruel! Ah, but you didn't even notice until I said anything, which only proves that my spit is neutral at worst and delightful at best.
( discussing characteristics of spit is probably one of Kuroo's smoother moves, and that's just sad. )
i may have shed a tear
[ daichi even makes a sweeping hand gesture to emphasize the point. seriously kuroo, even for being drunk that was still a pretty poor attempt. but then again, his own responses are getting slower, they really should stop drinking before this gets worse.
it doesn't help that after all those beers it's getting harder and harder to not openly laugh at kuroo and his shit. ]
What the hell are you talking about? That beer was way worse, doesn't that make your spit super nasty?
[ such sexy foreplay ]
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( he manages to stop laughing - barely, and lounges back at an angle that doesn't make his head spin quite so much. he should really have some water or something, he thinks, and takes another swig instead. close enough. )
What brings you from your lofty throne, ( a grandiose wave, ) to slum amongst us common folk? Did you feel the need for nasty beer and nastier body fluids?
( he doesn't mean it like that )
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daichi helps kuroo sit back up, shaking his head and giving the most overdramatic sigh he can muster. ]
Oh, it was always my dream to go to a normal high school with normal little country boys, raise a volleyball team from practically scratch, but I just loved it so much I had to keep going with it through university.
[ daichi doesn't keep a straight face through any of that, but kuroo is right there, warm and too funny, and so daichi just... goes with it. it's too easy, it always is, whenever kuroo is spurring him on. ]
Beer and body fluids are just, par for the course.
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( not that he necessarily wants to be, but does he want to be involved with some hick-fetish pedo?? probably not. can't trust these Karasuno guys. )
Spare me your sick tales, please. I'm not into that kind of thing.
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How do I know you're not the one lechering around?
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( possibly by spilling beer on them, like thi-- ok no, he's not that desperate. yet.
Kuroo lounges back with a shit-eating grin and nudges him with his knee. ) Any signals I'm missing?
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still though, this little rant begs a lot of questions, and daichi wants to ask them before they do anything that they are really, really going to regret come the morning. daichi doesn't leave until tomorrow night after all, and he'd rather not move that up. ]
Why don't you backtrack to the part where you admitted you invited me down here to get my pants off.
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I-- when did I say anything of the kind?! ( although, on the other hand-- ) Is that your wishful thinking speaking, Sawamura-kun?
( if so: fuckin' jackpot. Kenma wil never believe he pulled this off. )
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I think you're the only one wishful thinking, otherwise you wouldn't've brought up getting into my pants at all, Kuroo-kun.
[ daichi easily matches kuroo's obnoxious fucking tone, dying to see how flustered kuroo can get. ]
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Kuroo assumes his loftiest expression. )
It was an example of common lecherousnesses, Sawamura, an example. Or is showing a bit of ankle still considered flirting where you're from? ( his smirk widens, snide. ) If so, what should I make of you always turning up in shorts? What a harlot.
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So do you, hell, you don't even wear kneepads. Bringing up all this lecher talk that makes you like... [ he airly waves a hand, trying to grasp the right word. ] the biggest harlot.
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he carefully catches Daichi's hand before it can smack him in the face, and that's gonna be his firm excuse about why he's holding it. )
Wow, so eloquent. You're almost as smart as me when you're drunk, huh? ( Kuroo snickers, and never mind that he's poking fun at himself here, too. ) Of course I'm a giant harlot. This is the big city; that's what it's for.
( u hick )
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daichi tries not to stare at kuroo holding his hand because really, it's totally not a big deal. just two dudes being friends. for sure. ]
I take that as an insult, you know. [ he huffs, annoyed ] If that's what the city's for, no wonder I don't live here.
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Kuroo presses his free hand over his heart and attempts to reel. it's slightly offset by the fact that he does actually start to fall and has to use his grip on this mysterious hand to right himself. what a suave guy. )
I'm so hurt! If I knew you were going to be hell-bent on breaking my heart, I would never've invited you down, you know. ( the jackal grin returns. ) Ahh-- but you'll be living here soon enough, won't you? Best get used to it sooner than later, Sawamura. You're already halfway to trollop-dom.
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There's always time to change my mind before I let you corrupt me any further you know.
[ he's talking about college, really, no double meanings or things to look deeper into as daichi still holds onto kuroo's hand. ]
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At least give corruption a try before you run away from it. Where's the harm in that~?
( yeah this is totally a conversation about tertiary education and not about dudes holding hands on couches, drunk, and badly attempting to flirt. at all. )
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Oh, Sawamura, you sweet summer child, ( he uses Daichi's own hand to pretend to wipe away these fake tears, ) don't you know how the rest of the saying goes??
( --actually, how does it go?? ah, that's right. Kuroo leans in, grinning. there are crocodiles who would be jealous of this expression. )
'Satisfaction brought it back~'
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